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How to become strong in character and spirit. Strength may differ

How to become strong in character and spirit. Strength may differ

A ghost has been walking around the world for a long time, the ghost of a superman. Nietzsche merely formalized the attractive idea of the perfection of the volitional sphere. Everyone wants to know how to become stronger in spirit: it is almost impossible to get into the course on the will of Professor Kelly McGonigall at Stanford. And yet some knowledge can be obtained from the book of this interesting teacher

The pleasure is not immediate

Many problems of will are related to the fact that a person does not train himself to wait. This is the same desire for “everything at once.” Eat ice cream before getting home from the store (and drip it on clean clothes); prefer to watch TV in the evenings instead of self-education (and degrade intellectually), engage in premarital sex instead of intense platonic communication (and waste time on the wrong person). If you learn to put off pleasant things for later, as the strong in spirit can, your overall success will increase significantly.

Biochemistry of will

But desire alone is not enough - we are largely prisoners of physiology. Impulsivity is associated with insufficient brain activity. This happens as a result of injuries, hereditary characteristics and... poor nutrition. Impulsive people simply need to reduce the amount of carbohydrates in their food by increasing the amount of protein. Then, at the biochemical level, the function of the prefrontal cortex will be supported. How to become stronger in spirit? Less sweets, more cottage cheese, meat, fish. After some time, you will feel an improvement in your volitional abilities, and you will not crave sweets, just hold out for the first three days.

In the rhythm of self-control

How to become stronger in spirit using biological patterns? Physiologists have found that the best self-control is demonstrated by people whose heart can quickly and adequately change their heart rate. That is, with good temporary recovery rates after physical activity or stress. The bodies of professional athletes behave best in this regard. Hence the recipe: if you want to be stronger in spirit, regular training will be very useful. And you need to learn to breathe correctly in a situation of stress, that is, the inhalation should be forced and short, the exhalation should be long, stretched out so that all the air comes out.

Environment decides a lot

How to become stronger in spirit? Look for a competitive environment - people who are interested and motivated. Achievements are contagious. You can compete and still be friends. If you constantly move around strong and vibrant personalities, unusual ideas will begin to come to you. Without noticing it, you will become more strong-willed and successful. Try to exercise physically at least once a week with a stronger partner, and once with a weaker one. The first one will motivate you, the second one will help you learn to explain and be patient.

Thus, you need to learn to control your immediate desires. To help yourself with this physiologically, reduce the amount of carbohydrates in your diet and engage in regular exercise. Without “physics” almost everyone fails in the development of will. Try to create or find a stimulating environment.

A joyful and happy woman is confident in herself and does not lack strength and inspiration. The question of how to become strong does not even occur to her. It's a completely different matter when our desires are not realized...

A soft, vulnerable, sensitive woman... Those troubles that are a mere trifle for others bring you to tears. And people often simply take advantage of the kindness of a sympathetic heart. Your friends know that it’s hard to refuse you something, be it the best outfit or money “on loan until Friday.”

There's a problem with men. There is not enough determination to “put him in his place,” even when he behaves like a notorious scoundrel. Sometimes years of life and youth are spent in such painful relationships that a woman is unable to break. And at work, you don’t have the courage to insist on a well-deserved vacation or a long-promised promotion.

What to do? and protect yourself? The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan will help solve the problem.

Where does strength and self-confidence come from?

At the core of our psyche is the desire to receive joy and pleasure from the realization of our desires. When a person makes an effort and gets what he wanted, he enjoys life. A joyful and happy woman is confident in herself and does not lack strength and inspiration. The question of how to become strong does not even occur to her. After all, she gets what she wants with all her heart.

It's a completely different matter when our desires are not realized. I wanted magical romantic love - but what I got was a drunkard, a sadist or an idiot. I wanted a true friendship with my best friend - but what I got was a “underwater snake” that was ready to set me up or rob her at any moment. I counted on people’s understanding and sympathy - but the world stubbornly confronts me with “stale crackers.”

It seems that no one cares about your feelings. The search for ways begins. It’s better this way than to forever suffer with your vulnerability and harbor illusions about illusory happiness, right?

No, that's not true. System-vector psychology convincingly proves with thousands of results: any of our desires is provided with opportunities for their implementation. Therefore, whatever we strive for with all our hearts, we can achieve.

How to achieve what you really want?

How to become a strong and happy woman: step-by-step instructions

Step #1. Getting rid of illusions about other people

Very often the point is not that our goals are unattainable. If you want romantic love, family comfort or career growth- this means that this is quite possible to achieve. But any of our desires can be realized only through successful interaction with other people. And this is where the trap that we fall into often lies.

We unconsciously expect from people what we could do ourselves. We attribute to them our own qualities and properties, which they may not have at all. And then we experience bitter disappointment. After this, of course, you want to learn, in order to adequately fend off the blows of fate.

For example, a woman by nature has such qualities as honesty and directness, loyalty and devotion. It seems to her that her friend or partner will also behave this way. But expectations are not met: before her is a person who is guided by considerations of benefit and benefit. Rational pragmatist, confident and purposeful. For him there is no concept of friendship - there is only useful connections. And of course, he behaves completely differently.

When we are disappointed in people over and over again, it begins to seem that goals are unattainable and happiness is unattainable. However, this is not at all true. Just life in modern world requires psychological literacy. It is important to understand exactly what properties a person has and how he will behave in a given situation. The training “System-vector psychology” by Yuri Burlan allows you to determine this at a glance.

Life among people ceases to be a walk through a minefield. You can accurately choose a partner with whom you will be happy. Find the right tone with your boss. Successfully build relationships with children, parents and friends.

Step #2. Let's get to know ourselves better...

It seems that we know absolutely everything about ourselves. But even here there are a lot of surprises, not always pleasant ones. The fact is that other people have a significant influence on our entire life path.

Our parents, of course, leave a particularly strong imprint on childhood. For example, my mother had bad experiences with men. She had to raise and raise her daughter alone. From an early age she taught her: after all, her life did not spoil her with gifts. This was felt especially acutely by the generation that grew up in Russia in the dashing nineties. Due to the collapse of the state, men lost their jobs en masse, became drunkards, families broke up everywhere...

“Be strong, daughter! You yourself must be able to earn money to feed your children. You never know what can happen!” A particularly vivid imprint of mother’s words remains on girls who have the properties. By nature, these are children who are most attached to their mother. They strive to be obedient and the best daughters, following the advice of their parents.

However, she has no desire of her own to “spin and make money.” But she wants to build a happy family with all her heart.

If a woman has, then the words of the mother, repeated in childhood: “don’t cry”, “why did you let go of the nurse”, “let’s not have emotions” - can greatly influence the ability of a visual girl to correctly realize her enormous emotional potential. She seems to seal her sensuality inside herself.

Such a woman strives for family and marriage, comfort and reliable relationships, but unconsciously chooses as her husband someone who can be pitied. Without pity, her feelings simply do not “trigger.” Thus, drunkards, men who are unable to adapt to society, or even drug addicts often find themselves nearby - those with whom you will really have to do everything alone, including providing for children. Possessing incredible natural patience and wanting constancy in a relationship, such a woman “pulls along” an alcoholic or gigolo for years. And she endures something from which another would have long ago fled to distant lands.

There can be many unsuccessful life scenarios, imposed attitudes and psychological traumas. They do not always come from childhood - we receive them en masse in adulthood. For example, blindly following the standards of glossy magazines or listening to the advice of “experts” at women’s trainings. Systemic-vector psychology allows you to absolutely accurately separate your own desires from imposed and false attitudes, get rid of negative life scenarios and realize what your heart truly lies in.

Step 3. Realize your sensuality correctly

There is nothing unnecessary, irrational or wrong in nature. If from birth a woman is given high emotionality and the ability to feel subtly, this talent is not intended for suffering at all. When implemented correctly, it allows her to build deep emotional connections with people. And of course, create a romantic, sensual relationship with a man. How to achieve this?

Oddly enough, it is natural sensuality that can help a visual woman in... But her enormous emotional range needs to be channeled in the right way.

Empathy and compassion are the talent of the visual vector that needs to be developed and realized. The huge volume of emotions of a visual woman is not intended for one person and must find social application.

For example, in the work of a doctor one cannot do without empathy for the patient. The talent for building emotional connections will also come in handy when working with children - as a teacher, a primary school teacher. Or a teacher of their native language and literature: developing moral qualities in children, the ability to empathize with each other.

If fate has turned out that you have long ago chosen another profession and do not plan to change it, then you can get the missing realization of visual properties through volunteer work. Participate in helping orphans, sick, lonely elderly people. With such realization, a woman no longer even has the question of how to be strong in spirit. In terms of spiritual strength, she simply has no equal.

You can verify this at real examples from life. Known to everyone, she fearlessly transported wounded children from the hottest spots in the world. She provided them with first aid right in the combat zone. There was no place in her heart to worry about herself - she empathized so deeply with others. This does not mean that every viewer needs to immediately go to hot spots as a volunteer. All you have to do is start doing what you can do.

A realized visual woman is able to build very precise and deep emotional connections with a man. She is able to give her partner what a man actually needs: love and inspiration. Relationships built on such a basis have every chance to come true like a real romantic fairy tale.

Step 4. Resolving internal contradictions

A modern woman has a complex mental structure, which simultaneously includes the properties of three to five, and sometimes more vectors. Without realizing its structure, we are often overwhelmed by conflicting desires. We don’t realize why we want one thing or another.

For example, for a woman with an anal vector, the most important thing is family and children. She is driven, obedient to her man and loyal to society. Strives for fidelity and absolute monogamy. Conservative, committed to consistency in her way of life. The woman with is her complete opposite. Active and businesslike, logical and pragmatic, values and saves time and resources. Knows how to earn money, loves novelty, travel and change. Wants career growth and implementation of his ambitious plans.

If nature has endowed you with both properties at the same time, then it can be difficult to deal with your own contradictions and set priorities in life. And what if this bouquet is intensified many times over? emotional swings visual vector - it can be simply unbearable. System-vector psychology allows you to eliminate any contradictions and finally enjoy the breadth of opportunities that so many talents provide.

Step 5. Getting rid of psychotraumas

Some of us have deep psychological traumas that nullify all efforts to be happy. For example, in a skin vector, this is a scenario for failure. Moreover, for men this is primarily failure in their career, but for women it is failure in couple relationships: such women often attract sadists into their lives. Psychotrauma in the anal vector leads to delayed life syndrome, forming deep grievances against fate and simply an inability to move forward.

We have already managed to deal with this forever and get a new quality of life. to find out more.

The article was written based on training materials “ System-vector psychology»

When asked about strong people, what comes to mind are large, brutal men with big muscles and a determined look. But is this real strength? Is it possible to determine how strong people are by their appearance? Is it true that such people have a certain power of vision? Is it possible to develop this skill, or is it inherent from birth? In general, how do they gain strength? Next there will be strong advice for everyone who wants to become strong.

Who are strong people?

Strong people are those who have inner strength and determination. Keyword- “internal”. A person’s strength is determined by the core that shapes his behavior. We are all familiar with situations when a less impressive, but more “spiritual” opponent won the conflict. Why is that? Yes because appearance never reflects the essence. Two-meter height and “slant fathoms in the shoulders” can be inherited by a coward, but a short, thin guy can have a real “lion’s heart.”

How to understand which of them is stronger? Most likely, if you need to move a sofa, the first one will be stronger, and if you stand back to back, defending yourself from hooligans, then the second one. Although, there are nuances - hooligans, most often, are also cowardly, so they can be impressed by two meters in height, and the conflict simply will not begin. But this is not so important, because street fights are only a small percentage of those life situations where the strength of people is manifested.

How to define a strong person?

Inner strength has specific manifestations that are easy to detect in its owner:

Decisiveness in achieving goals;
Active life position;
The ability to say “no”;
Philosophical attitude towards failures;
Confidence in your strength;
Ability to take responsibility;
Life principles;
Self-love and self-respect;
Honesty towards yourself and others;
The ability to overcome your fears.

This list may not convey all the qualities of strong people, but it helps to form basic ideas about them. The strength of a person is not only the strength of his gaze, the decisiveness in his voice or bravado. Strong people become so thanks to a number of their moral qualities.

What does the power of gaze give?

Eyes are the mirror of the soul. Hardly anyone will argue with this statement. What we have inside is reflected in our eyes. The power of the gaze is manifested not only in confrontation. Girls are familiar with the power of the gaze of some men to arouse interest or attraction.

The power of a gaze can be calming, reassuring, attractive or even hypnotizing. But what is behind this power? Inner harmony and self-confidence. Is it possible to train the power of your gaze?, without deep work on yourself? I guess, yes. Many people know how to pretend to be stronger or more successful, but in reality they turn out to be ordinary liars. You don’t have to go far, just visit any nightclub and pay attention to the abundance of “alpha males” who have set up networks in the hope of seducing the next girl. In the morning, it’s difficult to even call many of them males, but in the evening their power of gaze is simply disarming.

There are several ways to develop the power of your gaze. First of all, increase your ability to make eye contact. What is needed for this? If you feel that you cannot “drill” someone with your gaze for a long time, but you don’t want to look away, you can look at the bridge of your interlocutor’s nose. Visually, it is almost imperceptible, but the duration of eye contact increases.

Secondly, it would be nice master self-hypnosis. For example, some guy is walking along a dark alley, and a drunk company meets him. If he had been a master of sports in boxing, perhaps this would not have bothered him. And so, the threat of getting punched is quite real. His only chance is to prevent a fight. If he pulls his head into his shoulders or timidly looks at his feet, then the chances of being pestered will increase. What to do? Straighten your shoulders, imagine yourself as a master of all possible martial arts and walk as if you have a TT in your pocket, and a company of soldiers behind your back. The main thing is not to overdo it. Otherwise it will be like in the joke when a passerby took in air, visually enlarging his chest. Having passed two big men, he exhaled with relief and heard two similar exhalations from behind.

How to become a strong person?

In order for the power of the gaze to be not feigned, but real, you need to be confident in your own abilities and match your self-esteem. Otherwise, you will be disappointed business card. But how can you become strong? It is worth paying attention to developing your character and willpower. Develop principles and stick to them.

Learn to say no those around you and not change your mind. Also, it is important to be active and proactive, and not be afraid of responsibility. It is advisable to devote time to your physical training. You don't have to become a professional athlete, but everyone can do it to be fit. Appearance, grooming, and cleanliness are no less important.

Also, for most adults, the main measure of success is their work achievements. To become more self-confident, they need to develop professionally. That is, everyone chooses for themselves what to be strong in.

Not less important attitude towards fear, especially before failures. Strong people do not give up, but draw conclusions from their mistakes and move on. They are more afraid of not trying than of failing.

The strength of the gaze depends on the inner strength. Strong people do not necessarily have impressive dimensions or a menacing appearance. Their power lies in their “iron” character and rich inner world. There is no point in developing a “withering look” without real confidence in your abilities. And for it to appear, you need to work on yourself, engage in self-improvement, and develop strong-willed qualities.

How to become mentally strong? This dilemma worries many individuals, because most people dream of powerful inner strength. Inner strength is a difficult quality to develop, the achievement of which requires a strong desire and internal reserves that will change the quality of life.

How to become a strong-minded person if you are overcome by everyday difficulties, give up, and have no strength to overcome life’s obstacles, to realize your desired plans and achieve your goals. First, it is necessary to define what fortitude is and who is a strong-willed person. So, fortitude is the harmony of the psychological and physical components of an individual. Therefore, it is important, when a person develops physically, not to forget about the development of intellectual and psychological factors.

A person with a strong spirit is able to independently resolve issues that arise in his life, unlike weak individuals who live at the expense of the strong. If a weak person uses negative experience to weaken himself, turning into an unfortunate victim, then a person who is strong in spirit and character will come out of any unpleasant situation with dignity. Strong personalities have many plans and desires, while weak ones have many needs.

A strong-willed person always has his own opinion. But the way of life of a weak person is to always need protection. A strong person is able to protect himself and his way of life is cooperation and influence on other individuals. Most individuals live according to patterns. A person endowed with spirit is above all patterns and will not react to any contradictory, traumatic situation with a conflict pattern.

A person with a strong spirit is not a coward and turns out to be stronger than his fear. This does not mean that such individuals are not afraid, they just know how to be stronger than their phobias and prejudices.

The stronger a person’s spirit, the more significant the burden of negative experience he is able to perceive and survive troubles with dignity. The weaker the person, the smaller the dose of troubles she can normally perceive.

How to become strong in spirit and character

In Iceland there is a wonderful proverb about this: “Everyone who did not stand firmly on their feet has long been blown away into the ocean.” Therefore, by developing yourself physically and psychologically, you can answer the question of how to become a mentally strong person.

Below are specific tips on how to become a strong-willed person:

- it is necessary to surround yourself with individuals with a positive attitude towards life, since long-term communication with, contributes to becoming the same as them;

— it is important to maintain relationships with spiritually developed and competent people who are inherently positive charge energy;

- you need to gain faith in yourself, this will give you strength and confidence in your actions, and clearly follow the principles you define for yourself. Without clear ideas about life, it will be difficult to create a specific strategy of action, which in turn will bring chaos into life;

- should study personal experience from own life, because this is the only way to master significant experience and acquire knowledge;

— it is important not to be afraid, but to learn from your mistakes; To do this, you need to analyze your actions more. Learning from one's experiences will make one more careful and smarter in the future;

- you need to be able to withstand adversity, since mental stability is important in stressful situations, predetermined by fate, therefore in unpleasant situations you should learn to be flexible;

- you need to be prepared for negative options for the outcome of events and not fall into a state of mind over this, losing your mind and common sense, and even if something went wrong, you cannot waste the time needed to solve the problem;

- it is required to be able to look fears in the eye, since they subconsciously influence life, even if the individual does not think about them;

— by spending time on introspection, figuring out why the fear arose, you can get rid of it; this requires doing what you are afraid of until the fear finally disappears. This is how most individuals get rid of many phobias. If a person cannot do what he is afraid of, he should try to think about fear more often, and then it will go away on its own;

- you need to become a doer, not a thinker. Individuals with a strong character do not wait for events to happen in their lives; they take active action themselves. You should proactively participate in events, and not passively react to everything that happens. It is necessary to work and try to do more every day than the previous day;

- you should start living today and not think about the future; thinking a lot about the future, a person puts off a lot of things until tomorrow, this applies to both relaxation and important matters;

- you need to understand that tomorrow is already today, so it’s time to put your plans into action. Only strong personalities live for today;

— it is important for a person to realize that the world is not ideal, this will allow him to do more for himself and not be distracted by unimportant things; Often people have very different ideas about life, so there is no point in re-educating or re-educating other individuals, but it is worth treating their weaknesses condescendingly.

Only a strong-willed person can realistically overcome life’s trials: dangerous and difficult. A strong spirit is cultivated over the years and all the efforts aimed at it are worth achieving - this is a rare and valuable quality.

So, the main rule on how to become strong in spirit and character is not to run away from what an individual is afraid of, but to look his fear in the eye, directing his gaze to what he fears most. And when an individual begins to overcome his fear, it will disappear, and the person will become stronger in spirit.

An example of how to become mentally strong. Consider this case: a person is about to part with his loved one. He is so afraid of this that mentally, replaying the breakup in his head, he is horrified by it and subconsciously tries to avoid those worries that he is very afraid of. And in order to become a strong-willed person, it is necessary, without interrupting the imaginary picture of the separation, to imagine the entire scene of the separation in all details. Initially, the horror of what is happening will come, the person will suffer at that moment, but after that the horror will disappear, and with it the fear. A person will no longer be afraid of separation in reality, since in his head he has already lived it. This will increase his fortitude and he will be ready for anything.

Another example of how a person can become strong in spirit. It is very important in life not to allow yourself to feel sorry for yourself. When an individual, being in a difficult situation, feels sorry for himself, angers those around him and fate, and blames them for what happened, then he is wasting his energy on a thankless task that only multiplies negative energy. Therefore, you should not feel sorry for yourself, but direct all your energy and strength to solving the problem.

There is no need to cling to the past, but rather to live in the present. By accepting what is happening in life only now, an individual is able to live, no matter what. For example, a person is overtaken by a disease that is difficult to cure. It is necessary not to think about how good it was without her. You need to accept the illness and learn to live with it. This is precisely what requires fortitude, which is cultivated due to the fact that a person understands the need to decide to live in the present time “here and now.” You should “accumulate” positive memories, good life moments, impressions. This will save you in any critical situations, even if there is no improvement. Only joyful memories give an individual hope that they will happen in the near future and for this it is worth believing in it.

It is important for a person to learn to forgive and then he can become strong personality. By forgiving, a person is able to move forward. Strength of spirit doubles after every brave, honest act and helps to cope with upcoming and subsequent difficulties, so it is important to grasp this simple logic and start helping yourself now.

This is, first of all, a person who knows how to control his consciousness. And this is a person who reacts to everything that happens to him only positively. When I noticed that negative thoughts also result in negative states in the body, I began to study what leads to negative thoughts and how negative thoughts can be translated into positive ones. I came to the conclusion that negative thoughts are caused by fears, worries about the past, and self-pity. And I began to think about how I could avoid such negative feelings.

From these reflections and self-experiments, the rules of a strong man were born.

One day I heard some rustling in the bushes not far from me. In fear, I ran away from the bushes, but the further I ran, the stronger my fear became. Fear did not let go, he ran after me and caught up with me, and the faster I ran, the faster fear pursued me, the more creepy his approaching steps seemed to me behind my back. And then I realized that you cannot run away from fear. When we run away from fear, we do not escape from it, but only drag it along with us. And then I plucked up my courage and stopped. I turned 180° to come face to face with the fear that seemed to be following me and breathing heavily at the back of my head. But there was no one behind me! The fear disappeared, evaporated. I calmly returned to the bushes that had frightened me, pushed aside the branches and looked into them. I saw a small mouse-like animal flash and rustle its paws on the grass. There was probably a nest there. That’s all my fear, which turned out to be completely illusory.

Very often our fears in life turn out to be fictitious. We are afraid of losing our job when there is no real danger of losing it. We are afraid of getting sick when there is no reason to be afraid. We are afraid of troubles, although they might not happen.

This is where the first rule of a strong man was born: do not run from fear.

Of course, there are real fears. But you can’t run from them, you can’t hide, you can’t hide. You need to honestly face your fear. You have to admit it to yourself. We need to understand it and analyze it. The fear you looked straight into the eyes is no longer scary. The fear that you are afraid to look into the eyes can really kill you. Observe your fears. Determine what you are afraid of in life. Look your fears in the eye and understand that you don’t have to give in to them.

I began to imagine a picture of how I was becoming more and more weak, how I could no longer walk, how terrible pains overcame me, how my relatives were caring for me, weak, how they were crying over me, dying... Pictures appearing before my eyes , were so bright that I could not hold back my tears, I cried, I rolled on the sand from horror and grief, I sobbed and screamed in despair... When I calmed down, I realized that my fear had gone somewhere. I had already “died” in my imagination - and thus freed myself from the fear of death. Freed from the fear of death, I became stronger in spirit. A strong spirit helped me cope with illnesses and prolong my life. This means that by looking fear in the eye, we deprive ourselves of strength and power over ourselves not only from the fear itself, but also from what causes it. By looking the fear of death in the eye, I deprived death itself of its power over me.

When I was sick, I often felt sorry for myself. And each time, self-pity deprived me of strength, did not bring relief, but made me suffer even more. I realized that self-pity is a waste of strength and energy. But I need strength and energy for something else - for recovery.

This is how the second rule of a strong man was born: do not waste your strength on self-pity.

Self-pity and resentment towards life exhaust and devastate us, and give absolutely nothing in return. They keep us moving in a vicious circle, returning to the same bitter thoughts for years and not allowing us to break out into light, freedom, hope and optimism.

Many grievances and regrets about the past also cause us to waste energy and distance us from healing. When I learned about my illness, I began to remember the blissful days of my early childhood, when I still didn’t know that I was sick and felt happy. I was offended by life and fate and regretted the irretrievably gone childhood until I realized that in this way I was only worsening my condition and bringing my end closer. I stopped regretting the past and directed all my thoughts to the future, trying to shape it the way I wanted it to be, that is, happy and healthy.

Thus was born the third rule of a strong man: do not live in the past. Remember: it's never too late to start over. But in order to begin to change, in order to begin, you need to let go of the past, no matter whether it was good or bad. You cannot live with the burden of past losses and failures. You cannot live with regret about past happiness. This takes away strength and deprives hope for the future. It’s all already gone - so let it go in peace, don’t try to return it, you won’t succeed anyway. Live for today.

Consequences follow from these rules. Here they are. Don't dwell on negative thoughts. Create a treasury of good memories in your memory and often return to the good things that happened in your life, but without regrets, but only with joy that it happened, and therefore will remain with you forever. Dream big. Make plans, learn to see the good in the life around you and not focus on the bad.

Learn to forgive. A person who carries a whole mountain of grievances cannot be healthy. Forgiveness is saying goodbye to the bitterness of resentment, to pain, to sad memories, to everything bad and unwanted that happened in your life. Do not hold grudges against offenders and enemies, do not hatch plans for revenge. Remember that the best revenge is neglect. Neglect grievances and offenders, do not carry them within yourself, do not think about them. You will be healthy.